With the passing of Queen Elizabeth II, and the ensuing ten day national mourning period, it’s got me to thinking about grief. Understanding Grief Some people may be surprised at their initial reaction to hearing the news, or in how they have responded to seeing others mourning in such a public way, finding that they are experiencing a sense of loss and grief that is unexpected – especially for people who would never identify as a monarchist. For some, it may be that the loss

Recently I talked about the four pillars of health of which relaxation is one. According to Dr Chatterjee a lack of relaxation is the root of many of the problems that he sees people presenting with in his GP practice; his reasoning being that modern life is incredibly stressful and our body’s natural stress response system is not built to cope with the kinds of challenges we face on a daily basis – at the end of the day we are perfectly adapted to live a hunter gatherer life

Often clients will describe themselves to me along the lines of “I’ve always been a worrier” or “I’m just not a happy person, never have been”. Understanding Your Mind: Breaking Free from Negative Self-Perceptions Our mind tells us stories about ourselves, and our life, though our thoughts and it is very easy for us to become fused with these thoughts and lose the ability to distinguish ourselves from them. They seem 100% believable to us and when we get caught up in our head

Discover how identifying your personal core values can help you stay motivated, set meaningful goals, and live a life aligned with what truly matters. Includes a personal values list and practical exercises.

Magical thinking is the belief that what happens in your mind directly influences the external world. Common magical thinking examples include believing your thoughts can cause harm, that a ritual prevents disaster, or that imagining something bad makes it more likely to happen. This is also known as thought-action fusion, and CBT can help. Over the years, research has shown that everyone has weird, shocking and sometimes scary thoughts at times. Some people recognise these t

Yesterday I went to a fabulous workshop all about how to improve gut health. You may wonder why I’m writing about it here, given that my blog is about mental health, but anyone who has worked with me will know that I like to take a holistic approach to mental wellbeing and look at the big picture. I’m really interested in there being a connection between the gut and the brain, as I find it fascinating to think that what we’re feeding ourselves can potentially have such an imp

In a previous post (here) I introduced the concept of the Four Pillars of health, of which exercise/movement is one. Modern lifestyle has a very sedentary nature to it and all of us can benefit from incorporating daily movement into our lives to improve not only our physical health but also our metal health. It doesn’t have to be hours pounding the streets in running gear or sweating it out at the gym, it can be as simple as incorporating a few movements into your daily routi

In a recent post I talked about self-esteem and self-acceptance. When we can accept ourselves, acknowledging both our flaws and our unique talents, the world may seem to become a more accommodating place for us. We may well find that some of the causes of our stress disappear and we consequently gain joyful experiences more frequently. Accepting ourselves completely is not easy – it entails courage, wisdom and compassion. When we are plagued by difficult emotions such as anxi

Recently I introduced the four pillars of health, of which sleep is one. Sleep is probably one of the most neglected pillars of the four, and one that we can frequently end up scrimping on for a variety of different reasons. But it doesn’t take much of a sleep deficit before we will start to feel the effects, and long term sleep deprivation may increase the risk of depression and anxiety, along with numerous physical health conditions such as weight gain, high blood pressure

Imagine I had a magic wand and could wave away anxiety so you’d never experience it again – would you want me to wave it? I ask variations of this question frequently when I am working with anxious clients, and the most common answer is: “yes please!!” But what would life without any anxiety be like? Would we really be better off? Back in 1908 a couple of psychologists called Yerkes and Dodson demonstrated a relationship between pressure and performance when they found that

Sleep, Movement, Nutrition, and Relaxation are the foundation of wellbeing. Understand how each of these is impacting your heath.

Comparing yourself to others is a reliable way to reduce your confidence, motivation, and self-esteem. It is quite a natural thing to do to make these types of comparisons, because most people do it. However, that doesn’t mean it’s a good, or healthy, move! Become the best version of yourself by avoiding comparing yourself to others There are a number of things to consider when you compare yourself to someone else: Everyone has a different starting point. You might be just le

Throughout the years of working with clients I have noticed that, regardless of the difficulties people are bringing to therapy, more often than not they are carrying around with them the harshest of critics in the form of their internal dialogue. Sometimes this leads to low self-esteem, a state where we frequently (if not constantly) judge and find ourselves lacking…an unhelpful thinking habit discussed in my earlier post here. There are two parts to self-esteem. Firstl

Clients often tell me that they can’t understand why what seems to be only a small event in their life has ended up triggering their distress and challenges. I usually talk them through a metaphor that helps them reflect why this may be. Imagine that someone is walking along a path made up from small pebbles. They have a rucksack on their back and as they walk along the path they pick up a pebble and pop it into the bag. Now, this rucksack has a hole in the bottom, so a sing

We all experience loss in our lives and the Ball in a Box metaphor is a way of understanding the experience of grief.

This is the final part of a series looking at common unhelpful thinking habits. These are patterns of thinking that our minds can slip into as a way of coping with challenging situations. You can read more about this in my earlier post here. The Pitfalls of Emotion-Driven Conclusions: How Feelings Can Mislead Reality The emotional reasoning pattern is a very common one thinking habit, and virtually everyone has experienced it at some point or other in their lives. It is a way

This is the tenth part of a series looking at common unhelpful thinking habits. These are patterns of thinking that our minds can slip into as a way of coping with challenging situations. You can read more about this in my earlier post here. Escaping the Traps of Judgemental Thinking Everyone makes judgement about things, other people, and themselves (it’s a natural thing to do!), but there are times when it can take you into the territory of an unhelpful thinking pattern if

This is the ninth part of a series looking at common unhelpful thinking habits. These are patterns of thinking that our minds can slip into as a way of coping with challenging situations. You can read more about this in my earlier post here. Demands of Life: Navigating Internal and External Pressures We all find ourselves subject to demands all the time, it’s just part and parcel of daily life. Some demands are external, and we have no control over those, but a great many are

This is the eighth part of a series looking at common unhelpful thinking habits. These are patterns of thinking that our minds can slip into as a way of coping with challenging situations. You can read more about this in my earlier post here. Decoding the Worrying Mind: Conquering Catastrophising Those of us who identify as worriers will be very familiar with this thinking pattern. It's funny, isn't it, how our minds have a tendency to jump to the worst case scenario rather t

This is the seventh part of a series looking at common unhelpful thinking habits. These are patterns of thinking that our minds can slip into as a way of coping with challenging situations. You can read more about this in my earlier post here. The Impact of Assumptions on Our Daily Lives We spend our lives trapped in our own heads, with no real way of being sure what is going on in the heads of others. Our minds have a tendency to compensate for this by making assumptions abo

Overthinking 101 - part 6 of 11 Table of Contents Here we are at part 6 of Overthinking 101 already! In this post, we'll explore why we sometimes blow small things out of proportion, and what we can do to stop it from happening so often. You don't need to have read the previous 5 posts to make sense of this one, but to get the most out of it, I can recommend catching up on the others. Especially the first one, which explains how these mental habits quietly shape the way we fe

Struggling with glass-half-empty thinking? Discover what mental filtering is, why your brain focuses on the negative, and how to retrain your thoughts with self-kindness and practical CBT tools.

Overgeneralising and assuming the worst fuels anxiety and hopelessness, especially during chronic stress. Learn what overgeneralising is, why it happens, and how to stop negative thought patterns before they spiral.

Discover what Black and White Thinking is, why it's so common, and how to shift toward a more flexible mindset using practical, compassionate CBT tools.