Top 16 Self-Help Tools Therapists Trust and Recommend
- Sarah Cosway
- May 8
- 17 min read
Updated: 4 days ago
Real tools. Real trust. Real change.
Table of Contents
How Self-Help Tools Can Support Your Therapy Journey and Mental Health
When you have a long conversation with someone, do you remember it verbatim, or do you tend to recall general themes and a few key takeaways?
It’s more common than you might realise for the latter to be the case.
It’s for this very reason that clients often have a hazy recall of parts of their therapy session.
Some sessions cover a huge amount in a short space of time, while others are highly emotionally charged — both can make it difficult to recall the exact details of what’s been said.
That’s why I love giving my clients a resource or two to take home after each session.
It gives them something to refer back to, helping to jog their memory and consolidating learning points from the session.
Over time, these resources form a toolbox that lays a solid foundation for their relapse prevention plan.
With the right tools, individuals become empowered to manage their mental health and improve their well-being.
Clients often express interest in using self-help resources alongside our work, but worry about finding trusted sources.
And it can feel overwhelming when browsing the sheer amount of content available.
In this post, I’ll recommend my favourite tool, and I'm also excited to share trusted resources from a group of skilled therapists, so that you can benefit from our collective knowledge.
Each colleague has chosen a tool that they believe can make a real difference to your wellbeing.
Below, you’ll find details about each therapist’s recommended resource, the rationale behind their choice, and links to connect with them directly.
We hope that you find these resources as helpful as we and our clients do!
1. Understanding Cognitive Distortions
Website: resilientmindtherapies.co.uk Instagram: @resilientmindtherapies
When anxiety or negative thought patterns take hold, finding the right strategies can make a significant difference.
Kerry frequently suggests this video on cognitive distortions to help clients understand their negative thought patterns:
This video breaks down common cognitive distortions. Those sneaky, exaggerated thoughts that fuel anxiety and self-doubt.
Here’s why it’s so helpful:
It identifies 10 common thinking traps (like assuming the worst or dismissing positives).
Explains how these patterns intensify emotional distress.
Explains how to step back and question them without self-judgment.
One of the most powerful takeaways from the video?
Thoughts feel true, but they aren’t always accurate.
When we learn to spot these thought traps and question them, they start losing their power.
Over time, this helps us respond to situations more clearly, rather than through anxiety's filter.
Kerry shared more of her insight recently in her guest blog, which considered how you can support a loved one who experiences OCD:
While understanding thinking traps is a powerful step, what happens when the thoughts keep coming, both uninvited and overwhelming?
That’s where our next tool comes in, a technique that helps us unhook from sticky thoughts and give our minds a little breathing space.
2. Managing Overwhelming Thoughts
Instagram: @empoweryoupsychologicalservice
Emily recommends trying a technique called thought defusion to manage overwhelming thoughts, and regularly shares this video from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy guru, Russ Harris, with her clients:
Why is this technique helpful?
Our thoughts can be incredibly powerful and affect our day-to-day lives, how we feel, and what we do.
Thoughts, particularly distressing ones, can easily grab and consume our attention, leading us to become fixated on, or “fused” with them.
When this happens, we can find it difficult to focus on anything else, and often find that our distress can increase, and our thoughts can spiral.
Thought defusion gives us an escape from this, allowing us to take a step back from our thoughts and see them for what they are, just thoughts.
This can help us gain a different perspective and reduce our distress.
Why Emily (and her clients) love this video?
Because it’s a really simple way to illustrate this technique that most people can relate to (even if you’re not a fan of sushi!)
She hopes you will find it helpful!
Despite learning to step back from our mental chatter, we can still be left trying to deal with the raw, uncomfortable emotions that we’ve been trying to avoid.
But rather than pushing them away, what if the real strength lies in making room for them?
3. Making Room for Difficult Feelings
Website: yourtherapywithleah.co.uk Instagram: @yourtherapywithleah
The Unwanted Party Guest metaphor is a powerful Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) resource Leah shares with her clients.
This video provides a memorable way to remember the concept of making space for difficult thoughts and feelings rather than trying to avoid or eliminate them:
It is a relatable metaphor, illustrating the ongoing efforts to control or suppress thoughts and emotions and the unintended consequences this can have on missing out on the things in life that matter - much like trying to throw an unwanted guest out of a party, leading to missing the party altogether.
ACT encourages the development of skills in making room for discomfort while continuing to engage in what matters most to a person.
This metaphor is useful for individuals who feel stuck in cycles of avoidance or emotional struggle.
It supports the shift from resistance to acceptance, forming part of a broader set of skills to help clients live more meaningfully even in the presence of pain.
Clients are left with a lasting image of how acceptance, not avoidance, can free them to show up fully for the moments that matter.
It is important, not only to embrace our own feelings, but also to create space for others to do the same, especially when it comes to young people.
This leads to our next resource because navigating tough conversations, like those around sex and identity, requires the same openness and acceptance.
It's not just about answering questions, but creating an environment where curiosity can thrive without shame.
4. Helping Young People Navigate Conversations About Sex and Identity
Website: lougoodwintherapy.com Instagram: @lougoodwintherapy
Lou tells me that when she is working with young people, she finds the resources on the BISH (Best in Sexual Health) website to be invaluable:
The website provides a succinct, targeted, and clear set of resources that focus on sexual health, sexual pleasure,e and consent.
Along with lots of other useful information about sex, gender, and identity.
The resources are aimed at adolescents from 14 years onwards and are written in an approachable and engaging way.
There’s also information for adults on similar topics, and Lou finds these to be invaluable to her practice as they provide foundational knowledge on sexual health topics in an accessible format for all her clients.
Whether working with teens or adults, Lou values how BISH bridges the gap between reliable information and real-life questions, offering a non-judgemental, inclusive, and practical approach to conversations that really matter.
As all of us, young and old alike, navigate our inner worlds, we can easily fall into unhelpful thinking patterns.
However, by equipping ourselves with strategies to manage these thoughts, we can foster healthier perspectives and emotional resilience, empowering us on our journey of self-discovery.
5. Managing Unhelpful Thinking
Website: fhpsychotherapy.co.uk Instagram: @failforwardwithfran
Francesca tells me that she is utterly obsessed with the website belonging to the Centre for Clinical Interventions (CCI), which is absolutely jam-packed with self-help resources:
Francesa's number one CCI booklet is entitled “unhelpful thinking styles”, which she tells me she references with pretty much every client she works with.
The CCI website is an invaluable resource because it offers free, evidence-based self-help materials that are easy to understand and use.
They cover a wide range of mental health issues (eg, anxiety, depression, low self-esteem, perfectionism) and are structured into clear, practical modules that guide readers step-by-step.
These workbooks empower individuals to better understand their difficulties and build helpful coping strategies at their own pace.
Managing unhelpful thinking is a crucial step towards breaking free from mental patterns that hold us back.
But even when we’ve developed healthier ways to approach our thoughts, we can still face moments when we feel stuck.
In those moments, it’s important to shift our focus toward making intentional choices; choices that move us forwards, even when the path feels unclear.
6. Making Intentional Choices When Feeling Stuck
Website: remotetherapy.space Instagram: @remotetherapy.space
Chris recommends:
explaining it is a brilliantly clear 15-minute video introducing one of the most powerful tools that he shares with his clients.
The ACT Matrix is a simple but profound framework that helps people notice their patterns of behaviour and make more intentional choices.
What makes this resource special is how it breaks down complex psychological concepts into an accessible visual tool that anyone can use.
The presenter guides viewers through creating their own matrix with just a piece of paper and a pen, helping them identify:
What matters most to them (their values)
What thoughts and feelings sometimes get in their way
Their habitual "away moves" (behaviours used to avoid discomfort)
Alternative "towards moves" that align with their values
He recommends this resource because it helps people develop psychological flexibility - the ability to stay present, open up to difficult feelings, and take actions that move them towards what matters, even when it's uncomfortable.
His clients often tell him this simple exercise provides an "aha moment" that helps them understand why they get stuck in unhelpful patterns and what they can do differently.
The beauty of the ACT Matrix is that it's not just a one-time exercise but a perspective-taking tool you can return to whenever you're feeling stuck or uncertain about which direction to take.
It empowers people to become more aware of their choices and live more intentionally.
Chris shared more of his insights on the Acceptance and Commitment Therapy approach in his recent guest post, exploring the power of present moment focus:
Making intentional choices can help us regain a sense of direction when we feel stuck, but sometimes, even with the best intentions, we can still feel unproductive.
In these moments, it’s not about forcing action but finding ways to connect with our self-compassion and approach tasks with a different attitude towards ourselves, even when it feels like progress is slow.
7. Finding Productivity When Feeling Stuck
Website: optimumpsyche.com Instagram: @optimumpsyche
Joanna has chosen this video as her favourite trusted resource:
She often recommends it to clients struggling with depression and other conditions that affect activity and productivity. She tells me that she's received feedback that clients find it helpful and, in some cases, quite revolutionary.
The video explains how mental health problems affect many different aspects of people’s lives, even the simplest tasks, and it also destigmatises the issue.
It emphasizes that care tasks are morally neutral and that our worth does not depend on these tasks.
It also encourages the viewer to take a new, more self-compassionate approach and to look for tailored solutions that will fit them best.
Joanna finds that when she shares this video at the beginning of treatment, it helps people in therapy to break any shame they may feel about their daily struggles, be able to talk about them more openly, and start making small but revolutionary changes.
While finding productivity can be challenging, it’s even more complex when navigating the unique hurdles of ADHD.
In this context, understanding how to tailor self-help strategies can empower the individual in routine building, managing distractions, and achieving meaningful progress, all the while embracing and celebrating the way ADHD brains work.
8. Effective Self-Help in the Context of ADHD
Website: moyacbt.co.uk Facebook: @moya_cbt
Although Moya CBT offers support to people experiencing a wide range of difficulties, such as depression, anxiety, and emotional distress (including excessive worry, obsessive and intrusive thoughts, fear relating to health, social situations, and trauma), Helen's special interest and expertise are in using CBT for ADHD.
She is a prolific creator of self-help materials, which she uses to support her clients, and when helping people with ADHD to manage symptoms, she likes to recommend:
This guide provides an overview of ADHD beyond the clinical symptoms and draws on Helen's lived experiences as a way of describing some of the nuances of ADHD beyond the clinical label.
She developed the guide to:
help people with an existing diagnosis of ADHD to see how CBT may be able to help them manage symptoms;
to help people who suspect they may have ADHD, understand more about it, over and above the clinical symptoms;
to help family and friends of someone with ADHD learn more about ADHD and CBT.
Ultimately, Helen created this guide to inform, empower, and support anyone navigating life with ADHD, whether that's personally or alongside a loved one.
Self-help strategies can lay the foundation for positive change, but sometimes, the toughest moments come when facing unpleasant emotions head-on.
For those times, learning how to respond differently, not with avoidance, but with awareness, can transform our emotional experiences and deepen our emotional resilience.
9. Responding Differently to Unpleasant Emotions
Website: jmpsychcoaching.com Instagram: @jm_psychology
James tells me that he likes to use this really versatile tool with his clients because it can be helpful for everything and anything:
He explains that although the STOPP approach was originally designed for managing anger and irritability, it is applicable to any strong, unpleasant emotions and involves practising creating distance from those feelings.
Key steps in the technique are:
Understanding why a situation has affected us;
Identifying the underlying thoughts;
Exploring alternative perspectives (e.g., What would I say to a friend in this situation? Will this still matter in a month's time?);
And finally, considering the most helpful, practical actions to take, ending with a focus on behavioural change.
Like any skill, it takes practice—but James finds that once clients get the hang of it, the STOPP technique becomes a kind of emotional first-aid kit they can carry with them wherever they go.
James shared more of his insights recently in his guest post about low self-esteem:
Learning to sit with discomfort rather than reacting to it builds emotional resilience, and this is a skill that is especially important when navigating experiences like intrusive thoughts and compulsions (a key component of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder).
Understanding the nature of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) gives insight into why the very things that we instinctively, and well-intentionedly, do to try to help those with OCD often backfire.
10. Understanding Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD)
Website: smrwellbeing.co.uk Instagram: @Mind_fulwellbeingco2024
Understanding your intrusive thoughts is the first step in loosening the grip that OCD can have on people.
Sophie always recommends this book to any of her clients suffering from OCD:
This book offers a compassionate, practical guide for managing the distress these intrusive thoughts can cause.
At the heart of the book, and of OCD itself, are some key principles that help explain how the cycle takes hold:
Intrusive thoughts enter our minds involuntarily.
We give meaning to the involuntary intrusions.
How it makes us feel - often guilt and shame.
Obsessions and/or compulsions develop to cope with the meaning and feelings triggered by involuntary intrusions.
When the perceived emotional or physical risk of not performing a compulsion feels too high, the cycle continues and becomes increasingly difficult to break.
Sophie also finds it useful to explain to clients that OCD is like a mind bully, because OCD targets what you value and care about the most.
This handout helpfully explains the metaphor: The Mind Bully
By understanding the OCD cycle and developing tools to challenge it, resources like this empower you to take back control from your mind bully.
Understanding OCD illustrates just how powerful our minds can be, not just in creating distress in the first place, but also in driving meaningful change to overcome that distress.
That same powerful potential exists in all young people, and with the right support, we can help them harness it to make positive, lasting choices in their lives.
11. Empowering Young People to Make Positive Changes
Website: CBTHub.org Instagram: @cbt.hub
Deya works with young people and often recommends:
to help the young person understand how Behavioural Activation (BA) can shift their experience from doing less and feeling low, to engaging in activities that provide a sense of purpose and fulfilment.
Its clear, visual approach helps young people connect with the material, opening up valuable conversations about values, motivation, and self-worth; crucial themes in the treatment of adolescent depression.
This is empowering for the young person and facilitates them in making positive changes in their daily lives.
It also encourages young clients to take small steps towards increasing their activity, recognising that even gradual changes can lead to lasting improvements.
Designed to support brief BA interventions with young people, this resource is based on Reynolds & Pass's (2021) Protocol on Brief Behavioural Activation for Adolescent Depression and provides a simple, structured approach to introducing the principles of BA in a way that resonates with young people.
By breaking the cycle of inactivity and low mood, young people rediscover motivation and hope, one achievable step at a time, enabling them to build momentum, boost their mood, and regain a sense of control in their lives.
Supporting young people to make positive changes often starts with building their confidence in relationships and social situations.
One common hurdle? Friendship anxiety: the worry about fitting in, being liked, or navigating conflict.
And it's not just young people, friendship anxiety can shape how people of all ages see themselves and others.
12. Understanding Friendship Anxiety
Website: ContentedMind.uk Instagram: @thefriendshipanxietytherapist
Rebecca helps people work on feeling calmer and more confident in their personal life, such as being more secure in friendships, being able to say no, and overcoming self-criticism.
Many people struggle to feel secure in friendships and find them stressful, but don't realise it's a common problem, particularly for people with low self-esteem.
So Rebecca recommends this blog article:
which explains 'Friendship Anxiety' - a common, but little discussed, problem that many people experience.
The article identifies friendship anxiety as persistent worry and insecurity in platonic relationships, and helpfully explains how it differs from social anxiety.
It discusses common signs (like overthinking interactions or people-pleasing), explores underlying causes (including low self-esteem, attachment styles, neurodiversity, and evolutionary factors), and offers evidence-based tools such as mindfulness, cognitive restructuring, and self-compassion to help the reader manage their friendship anxiety.
It's a helpful and normalising read for anyone who feels friendships are harder than they “should” be.
Just as anxiety can create emotional tension, it can show up in the body too: racing hearts, tight chests, restless legs, and more!
Understanding and managing these physical symptoms of anxiety can be a powerful way to regain a sense of calm and control.
13. Managing Physical Anxiety
Website: sociallyfearless.com Instagram: @socially_fearless
Sophia recommends the following video for clients who are struggling with physical anxiety symptoms:
She explains that,
The more we focus on the physical symptoms of anxiety;
The more they intensify;
The more anxious we feel; and
The more hypervigilant we become of physical symptoms in the first place.
She finds the technique described in the video to be really effective in breaking down this vicious cycle.
Sophia’s resource is a simple but powerful reminder:
What we resist, persists.
Learning to sit alongside our physical symptoms rather than battling them can help loosen anxiety’s grip.
Sophia shared more of her insights on managing anxiety in her recent guest post, where she compared Social Anxiety and Generalised Anxiety Disorder:
Physical symptoms might be the first alarm bell, but it’s often our thinking patterns that keep anxiety ringing.
By learning to notice and shift unhelpful thoughts, we can begin to change our relationship with anxiety, and ultimately with ourselves.
14. Changing Relationships with Unhelpful Thinking Patterns
Website: deanwatkinstherapy.co.uk Instagram: @deanwatkins15
Dean often recommends the “thanking your mind” video from Russ Harris for people struggling with unhelpful thoughts and overthinking.
He explains that the more we focus on and engage with difficult thoughts by arguing with them, debating them, suppressing them, and distracting from them, then:
The more power and importance we give them
The more distressing they become
The more we believe them
The more we get pushed around by them.
He finds that the “thanking your mind” strategy can be a simple and effective strategy with practice to help break these unhelpful thinking patterns.
This powerful technique encourages us to build a new relationship with our thoughts, one that’s lighter, kinder, and far less exhausting.
Don’t be fooled by its apparent simplicity; this technique offers an effective introduction to cognitive defusion and can pave the way for deeper therapeutic work.
As we reshape our relationship with unhelpful thinking, it’s worth remembering that these patterns don’t always clock off at bedtime.
Sleep can often become a battleground for those experiencing anxiety, so learning how to wind down both body and mind is essential for rest and recovery.
15. Improving Sleep
Website: younge-goals.kit.com Instagram: @youngegoals
Joanne often recommends this accessible, graphic novel-style booklet for patients who struggle with literacy or have difficulty concentrating, especially when sleep problems make it hard to absorb large amounts of text:
She explains that the booklet serves as a helpful visual reminder of the session, giving her clients something to take home that covers all the key ingredients for good sleep, e.g., establishing a wind-down routine, particularly one that involves switching off from electronic devices (a major issue nowadays).
It also incorporates the impact of thoughts and behaviours on the physical state (in this case, tiredness, or readiness for sleep), which is a key consideration of CBT.
Very helpfully, it includes a ‘before and after’ sleep diary, which is an ideal homework task relating to the session focus, and will provide learning to build on in the next session.
Overall, Joanne finds that having a clear, visual resource empowers her clients to reinforce what they've learned and feel more confident about making positive changes to their sleep habits.
And last but not least, my own contribution explores the power of reconnecting with your 'why', that deeper meaning that anchors you throughout life.
Because when we understand what drives us, we’re better equipped to move through life with clarity, even when the path isn’t clear
16. The Power in Knowing Your Why
Website: coswaycbt.co.uk Instagram: @cosway_cbt
With most of my clients, I end up having a conversation about values, because tapping into what truly matters to them can supercharge the work we are doing together.
I explore two key questions with them:
the kind of person that they aspire to be; and
what the best version of their life looks like.
To bring this idea to life, I love to introduce them to this video:
Comedian Michael Jr. makes the point that when people are searching for a sense of purpose or meaning in life, they usually ask the question:
"How do I know what I am supposed to be doing?"
But he cleverly illustrates the point, using a member of the audience, that what we should actually be asking is:
"How do I know why I'm here?"
Every time I share this clip with a client, I rewatch it myself, and it never, ever, fails to give me goosebumps! And clients often say the same.
For me, it is such a powerful illustration of the importance for our wellbeing of connecting with our values in our daily life, even the tiniest and most mundane of tasks feel different if we can connect them back to something meaningful.
I talk about this in more depth in this post:
What Are Core Values and Why Do They Matter?
The powerful message that Michael Jr. conveys is:
When you know your why, your what becomes more clear and impactful because you are walking towards, or in, your purpose.
It's a simple idea that can slowly and gently shape how you show up in your life.
So there we are, 16 trusted self-help resources carefully chosen by therapists practising across the field of mental health to support your journey towards wellbeing.
Because mental health is unique to each of us, there is no one-size-fits-all when it comes to our well-being.
So take those tools that resonate most with you and don't be afraid to experiment with them in your day-to-day life.
Remember that personalising and adapting these tools to suit your needs is part of the process.
And remember that small steps consistently taken are far more powerful than occasional leaps - be patient with yourself and trust that every effort contributes to your growth.
About the author: Sarah Cosway is a BABCP accredited Cognitive Behavioural Psychotherapist with over a decade of experience working in mental health both within the NHS and in private practice. She offers tailored CBT in a compassionate, collaborative environment, empowering clients to build resilience and manage their mental wellbeing with confidence.
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